Missing Matthew

It has been a difficult week. After many late-night talks, prayers and tears, my oldest child, Matthew, has decided to live with his Dad in Thatcher. Thatcher can provide the good friends, good school and all the wonderful small town experiences that any 16-year-old boy would want. Darren and Sara are excited to have Matthew in their home and I am confident that they will provide all the love and structure that he needs. I will only be a phone call (and a 5 hour drive) away!

Matthew is an amazing young man and I am so proud to be his Mom. He is a bright light and an incredible example in my life. Even as a toddler, Matthew was always concerned about my feelings. He always wanted me to be happy. He is the first to notice my new haircut or a new picture on the wall. He is quick to compliment a new recipe I try - even when everyone else in the family hates it, Matthew will say he loves it and ask for more! He never wants to hurt my feelings. He will be a wonderful husband to some lucky girl!!

During the 3 years that I was a single mom, I depended heavily on Matthew and he never let me down. He was the "man of the house" from ages 5 - 8 and his maturity, compassion and responsibility came through when I needed him the most. As a 6th grader, Matthew would lovingly comb and style Rylee's hair each morning (an extremely difficult task which Rylee never made easy) - I would leave for work before the kids were up and Matthew knew that it was important to me that Rylee look presentable. He did this because he loves me and he loves his siblings.

I know that this has been a difficult decision for Matthew, but we all feel that it will be a great experience for him. The void left in our home will be difficult for me to bear - please excuse and understand my random tears! I love this kid so much and will miss him dearly.

Sweet Rylee

Yesterday, Rylee came home from school with a huge grin on her face. She immediately told me about what a great day she had and that a boy in her class had given her a pair of earrings. She was so proud of the earrings and could not wait to put them on!! I asked her how the boy had given these earrings to her. She answered, "It's a long story, Mom." I assured her that I had time for her long story about the earrings. :) She said, "He gave them to another girl first, but she didn't want them. Then he gave them to another girl and she didn't want the earrings, either. So he gave them to me." She was thrilled with the gift! Oh, to be sweet and innocent!!

Young Women

I have recently been called to serve as the 1st Counselor in the YW Presidency in my ward. I am excited about this new opportunity and experience. I was able to go to girl's camp this past summer and was so impressed by the young women in our stake and specifically in our ward - what a wonderful group of girls! I am honored to be working with them and I can't wait to get to know them better - I know that they will teach me a great deal and I hope to be a positive influence in their lives, as well.

In my scripture study, I came across these scriptures: D&C 6:34 & 36 "Therefore, fear not, little flock; do good; let earth and hell combine against you, for if you are built upon my rock, they cannot prevail. Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not." This reminded me that if we built upon the rock of the gospel, we have nothing to fear. I love the Lord's reference to his "little flock" - it is easy to feel outnumbered and insignificant in the world, but he knows us and loves us and we matter to him. As we look unto the Lord in every thought and decision, we will be on the right path. I needed this positive reminder today.

Lilee

Lilee had a big day today!

She is now officially weened off the bottle - this was a little tramatic, but we both survived. At one point, her and I were both in tears. Something about her standing in her crib and calling out for "mama" and "baba" (aka bottle) broke my heart.

I love this sweet girl - I hope she does a little better tomorrow. I hope I do a little better tomorrow!!

My Blog Attempt

For Christmas, my wonderful brother-in-law, James, designed this blog layout for me. I love it!!

One of my goals for 2010 is to post updates to this blog at least twice a week. My hope is that I can print it at the end of the year and it can serve as my journal. Honestly, I'm very nervous about having enough exciting information to share - my life is pretty boring and I'm not quite the story teller that Shawn is. I will try to be entertaining, but make not guarantees!! :)